thinking about blinking – 11/29/12

11/29/12 3:41am – 12/9/12 12:04pm

thinking about blinking
(celebratory signal)

everything that the desensitized
present is i am, but also everything
that I am against.
i do not find shelter in it’s comfort or
comfort in it’s shelter
i do my best to fight these bouts of
micro sleep.

to think of all the lives i’ll have lived if
i can just rid myself of these eyelids.
these same eyelids allowed to shut at
sight of uncomfortable moments,
but most times do not.
these same eyelids that can not help
but blink when the sound of clapping

even this celebratory signal is enough
to send me into a fit of strobing reality.
this involuntary action may be
all that’s left relating us to those who
have come before us.
to remain feeling organisms we must
retrain ourselves.

no longer can we hold open eyes for
the indifferent to blow air into.
we must choose these moments to rest
our eyes.
when faced with picturesque moments i
will struggle against the body’s
involuntary will to overt eyes.